LONG TIME NO POST

OK I CAN'T BELIEVE I DID NOT WRITE WHEN THEY DID THE EMBRYO TRANSFER SO I WILL START THERE.  SO WE WENT TO THE DR. LAST THURSDAY FOR THE EMBRYO TRANSFER. I HAD A NERVOUS BREAK DOWN THAT MORNING. I WAS SO NERVOUS THAT IT WOULD NOT WORK.  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 SO THAT WAS GOOD THAT WE HAD THE TWO. SO THE DR. WANTED TO MAKE SURE THAT WE STILL WANTED TWO. HECK YES! SO THE NURSE TOOK ME BACK AND TOLD ME TO CHANGE. SO QUINT AND I PUT OUR GOWNS ON, MASKS, BOOTIES, AND HAIR NETS. WE LOOKED GOOD! LOL SO I WENT IN AND THEY PUT WARMING BLANKETS ON ME AND THE NURSE DID AN ULTRA SOUND ON MY STOMACH WHILE THE EMBRYOLOGIST GAVE US A PICTURE OF OUR FUTURE KIDS. I HELD ON TO THAT TIGHT! THE EMBRYOLOGIST ASKED US 5 TIMES OUR INFO SO THEY DID NOT MIX ANYTHING UP.  SO THE DR. CLEANED EVERYTHING UP AND THEN TOOK THE EMBRYOS IN AND I THOUGHT I WOULD FEEL THEM BUT I DID NOT. IT WAS KIND OF UNCOMFORTABLE BUT NOT A HUGE DEAL. HE INSERTED THE EMBRYO'S AND THEN THE EMBRYOLOGIST CHECKED WITH THE MICROSCOPE SO SEE IF THE EMBRYOS WERE IN AND THEY WERE! THEY SENT ME HOME AND I RESTED THAT DAY.  I WAS SO NERVOUS! DID IT WORK? DID IT NOT WORK? AAAAH THIS IS SO HARD. I AM TRYING TO HAVE FAITH BUT IT IS SO HARD. SO MY MOM TOOK JAXTEN THURSDAY AND QUINT'S MOM TOOK HIM FRIDAY.  QUINT TOOK HIM TO THE ZOO WITH GABBY ON SATURDAY.  SO I WAS GOING CRAZY ON BED REST BUT IT IS NOW OVER.

SO TODAY I WENT TO LIBERTY PARK WITH MY MOM, JAXTEN, HANNAHM=, AND SERRA. IT WAS A GOOD DAY. WE WENT ON THE SLIDES, HAD A PICNIC, WENT ON SOME RIDES. WHICH WERE PRETTY GHETTO. FUNNY PICS COMING SOON. SO THIS WHOLE TIME NOT KNOWING IF OR IF NOT IS SO HARD FOR ME. I AM GOING NUTS AND I HAVE SO MUCH ANXIETY I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO SOMETIMES. I AM TRYING TO STAY POSITIVE BUT I HAVE A COPING MECHANISM THAT IT WILL HURT LESS IF I AM WHEN I FIND OUT.  I AM SO SCARED AND I DO NOT KNOW IF I CAN TAKE IT IF IT DOES NOT WORK OUT. MY GOAL IS TO HAVE FAITH BECAUSE I CANNOT DO ANYMORE. IT IS UP TO GOD AND I NEED TO LEAVE IT TO HIM. WHICH IS VERY HARD FOR ME! I KNOW WHEN I AM GETTING MY ANSWER BUT I AM NOT LETTING ANYONE ELSE KNOW.  MY MOM KNOWS BUT THAT IS IT. SO THIS IS DRIVING ME NUTS AND I HOPE THAT MY ANSWER IS GOOD AND I HOPE THAT I CAN GET A BREAK.  I JUST CAN'T TAKE ANYMORE PAIN. WISH ME LUCK...

EGG EXTRACTION DAY

SO I TOOK A PREGNANCY TEST ON FRIDAY AROUND NOON AND IT WAS POSITIVE ALMOST IMMEDIETLY. I TOLD QUINT I WAS PREGNANT, I KNOW MEAN THING TO DO. SO JAXTEN SLEPT IN UNTIL 11AM WHICH HE HAS NEVER EVER DONE IN HIS LIFE. IT WAS GOOD TO SLEEP IN. I WAS VERY SORE TH IS DAY AND I TOOK WORK OFF AND I TRIED TO TAKE IT EASY. I SLEPT AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE AND RESTED UP FOR THE BIG DAY.
I WOKE UP AND TOOK A SHOWER AND GOT MYSELF READY FOR THE DAY.  I HAD TO WAKE JAXTEN UP SO I COULD TAKE H IM TO HIS AUNT KJERSTEN'S HOUSE.  I COULD NOT EAT OR DRINK ANYTHING AFTER 4AM. WHEN I WOKE UP I WAS VERY THIRSTY PROBABALY BECAUSE I KNEW I COULD NOT DRINK. WE GOT TO THE DR'S. AT 9 AM THERE WAS ONE COUPLE IN FRONT OF US. ANGELA WAS MY NURSE FOR THE DAY, SHE TOOK ME BACK AND EXPLAINED WHAT THEY WERE GOING TO DO IN THE PROCEDURE. I HAD TO PUT A GOWN ON AND BOOTIES AND A CAP FOR MY HAIR. QUINT CAME IN AND SAT WITH ME FOR A WHILE. THEY TOOK ME BACK AND I GOT ON THE TABLE AND THEY PUT SOME REALLY WARM BLANKETS ON ME. WHICH I LOVED~!!! THEN THEY NUMBED MY ARM U P AND PUT IN VERCED TO MAKE ME KIND OF LOOPY. THEN I REMEMBER THEM PUTTING A OXYGEN MASK ON ME AND NEXT THING I KNOW I AM OUT OF SURGERY. I DID NOT EVEN KNOW THEY HAD STARTED. THE NURSE TOLD ME THAT THEY GOT 33 EGGS. WHICH IS UNHEARD OF, SO THAT MADE ME FEEL GOOD. I OVERWHELMED THEM WITH ALL OF MY EGGS. I WAS VERY SORE SO THEY GAVE ME MORE DEMORAL FOR THE PAIN. I GOT H OME AND TOOK A BATH AND RESTED THE WHOLE DAY. I TOOK SOMETHING FOR PAIN AND JUST RESTED. I WAS VERY SORE AND DECIDED TO EAT CHEESE POPCORN NOT VERY SMART TO DO!!!LOL! I STARTED THROWING UP, NOT SO FUN. QUINT WENT TO LUNCH WITH JACE AND WENT TO TOY STORY WITH JAXTEN AND MY MOM. HE DID PRETTY WELL! THAT WAS HIS FIRST MOVIE EVER. QUINT GAVE ME PHENEGREN FOR NAUSIA AND I HAD RAMEN FOR DINNER. WHICH HIT THE SPOT FOR ME. RAYLENE RUSSELL CAME OVER AND BROUGHT ME DINNER AND WAS ASKING ABOUT THE PROCEDURE. I WENT AND TOOK ANOTHER NAP FOR THE NIGHT. IT WAS A GOOD AND BAD DAY!
TODAY I RESTED TIL ABOUT 11AM AND QUINT TOOK JAXTEN TO HIS MOM'S HOUSE AND SHE WATCHED H IM SO WE COULD REST. THEY COOKED US DINNER AND THEN QUINT DROPPED ME OFF AT MY MOM'S HOUSE. THE NURSE CALLED AND SAID OF THE 33 EGGS THAT SURVIVED 22 WERE MATURE. OUT OF THE 22 EGGS 5 HAD DIED LEAVING US 16. WHICH IS STILL A HIGH NUMBER! THEY ARE PLANNING ON IMPLANTING THEM ON THURSDAY WHICH IS A BLASOCYST STAGE AND THAT IS A 100 CELLS. 1 OF MY EGGS ONLY HAD MY DNA, 1 HAD ONLY QUINT'S DNA, AND ONE HAD TOO MUCH DNA, AND THE OTHER TWO DIED OFF. I AM PRAYING FOR THEM TO KEEP SURVIVING AND HOPING FOR TWO! BUT ATLEAST ONE BABY. I HOPE I H OPE THIS WILL WORK. WE ARE LUCKY TO GET SO MANY EGGS. MY DR. SAID I HADD 3X'S AS MANY AS MOST PEOPLE. YES!!!!!

TRIGGER DAY

BIRTH CONTROL AND LUPRON SHOTS

TRIGGER SHOT

SKIN REACTION TO MEDICATION

MY NIFTY ALCOHOL WIPES

MY NEEDLES THAT I DREW MY MEDICINE WITH.PROGESTERONE SUPPLEMENT

SO TODAY WAS A BIG DAY FOR ME. I FOUND OUT THAT I HAVE ABOUT 6 BIG EGGS AND I COULD DO MY TRIGGER SHOT TODAY. QUINT WENT WITH ME BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN FEELING REALLY DIZZY LATELY. MY OVARIES ARE SO BIG THEY ARE ALMOST TOUCHING EACHOTHER. I WENT TO BREAKFAST THIS MORNING YUMMY! WE PICKED UP JAXTEN FROM MY MOM'S HOUSE AND HEADED HOME FOR THE DAY. I AM VERY SORE TODAY AND I AM HAVING HOT FLASHES!!! HEATHER CALLED ME AND TOLD ME TO TAKE MY MED AT 10:30 PM ON THE DOT. SHE GAVE ME INSTRUCTIONS FOR MY SURGERY ON SATURDAY. I AM SCHEDULED FOR 9:30 AM AND I AM PRAYING THAT THEY WILL GET SOME GOOD EGGS. THIS REALLY HAS BEEN HELL THIS YEAR FOR US SO I AM PRAYING THAT THIS WILL BRING US SOME GOOD EGGS AND EMBRYO'S. I DID THE SHOT AND THE TIME I WAS SUPPOSE TO SO NOW IT IS NOT UP TO ME. I DID EVERYTHING THAT I COULD WITH THE MEDICATION. IT IS NOW OUT OF MY HANDS AND I NEED TO TRUST MY DRS. SO HEATHER IS NOT GOING TO BE THERE AND THAT MAKES ME SAD BECAUSE I HAVE REALLY BECOME ATTACHED TO HER. KIND OF SOUNDS WIERD BUT SHE GOT ME THROUGH THIS. RCC HAS BEEN NOTHING BUT NICE AND I HAVE EXPERIENCED THE BEST CARE I POSSIBLY COULD EVER GET. THEY HAVE MADE THIS EXPERIENCE GOOD SO FAR!!!! I WILL KEEP YOU POSTED ON MY PROGRESS.

DAY 25-27

SO THESE LAST COUPLE OF DAYS HAVE BEEN EXTREMELY HARD ON MY BODY! I HAVE BEEN CRAMPING SOOO BAD AND I FEEL LIKE MY OVARIES ARE GOING TO EXPLODE. I GOT A BREAK FROM THE DR. ON MONDAY AND QUINT AND I WENT TO LUNCH AND WE SAW ECLIPSE AGAIN!!!!! IT WAS FUN! IT IS NICE TO GET AWAY BY YOURSELF EVERY NOW AND AGAIN.

I HAD AN APPT. ON TUESDAY AND I PASSED OUT AT THE DR. OFFICE. THEY HAD ME LAY ON THEIR COUCH AND DRINK SOME JUICE. I DO NOT KNOW WHY I WAS SO DIZZY THAT DAY. THEY TREATED ME VERY GOOD. I WENT TO WORK NOT FEELING VERY GOOD BUT I LASTED THROUGH THE DAY. WE WENT TO QUINT'S DAD HOUSE AND I GOT A BLESSING FROM JACE, JON, AND QUINT. THAT WAS NICE TO HAVE, WE THEN WENT TO EAT SOME PIZZA WHICH WAS YUMMY!!!! I WENT TO BED WHEN I GOT HOME BECAUSE I WAS SORE.

SO TODAY I HAD A DR.  APPT AND THE EGGS ARE STILL NOT BIG ENOUGH. SO I WENT AND BOUGHT ONE DOSE FOR TONIGHT.  I WENT TO THE PHARMACY AND THEN WENT BACK TO THE DR. OFFICE TO PAY. THEN I WENT TO THE DI AND GOT US SUBWAY FOR LUNCH.  DR. HATASAKA TOLD ME MY EUTERUS LOOKS VERY GOOD! SO TONIGHT I WAS GIVING MY MEDS TO MYSELF I SPILLED IT ALL OVER MY MOM'S COUNTER. I HAVE AN ANXIETY PANICK ATTACK. IT IS AFTER HOURS AND I NEED MEDICINE SO I CALL THE AFTER HOURS NUMBER AND THEY HAD ME TALK TO HEATHER AND SHE TOLD ME TO HEAD UP THERE AND SHE WOULD DONATE SOME MEDICATION TO ME. WHICH WAS VERY NICE, I FELT VERY BAD!!!! TRAFFIC WAS HORRIBLE, MY MOM DROVE ME BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE I WAS LIGHT HEADED AGAIN. HEATHER GAVE ME A SHOT AT THE OFFICE AND THEN WE WENT TO OLIVE GARDEN AND CAME BACK TO MY PARENT'S HOUSE. MY DAD GAVE ME A BLESSING AS WELL AND THEN I CAME BACK HOME. I KNOW THIS WILL TEACH ME A LESSON AND I KNOW IT WILL WORK OUT FOR THE BEST. I AM THINKING MY EGGS WILL BE READY TOMORROW AND WE WILL HAVE THE SURGERY ON SATURDAY.  I HOPE THAT THEY GROW SOME TONIGHT AND WE WILL BE GOOD. I HOPE WE GET SOME GOOD EGGS THAT WILL GROW US SOME BABIES. I HOPE!!!!

DAY 22-24

SO THIS WEEKEND HAS NOT BEEN SO FUN! I WENT ON FRIDAY TO MY DR. APPT AND THE EGGS WERE 10MM AND THEY NEEDED SOME GROWING TO DO. MY ESTRODIAL LEVEL WAS 350 THAT DAY. I GOT THE WORST HEADACHE IN MY LIFE. IT TURNED INTO A MIGRAINE. QUINT WORKED THAT NIGHT SO MY MOM TOLD ME TO STAY OVER AND MY DAD COULD GIVE ME SOME MEDICATION AND SHE WOULD WATCH JAXTEN. I TALKED TO DR. HATASAKA THAT NIGHT AND HE TOLD ME TO TAKE IMMATREX. I WAS ZONKED FROM THE PHENEGREN SHOT MY DAD GAVE ME. WHICH HURT REALLY BAD BY THE WAY... MY BUTT IS STILL SORE. THE NEXT DAY WE HAD A SWIMMING PARTY AND I TOOK JAXTEN SWIMMING AND HE HAD A GOOD TIME. THEN QUINT WORKED AGAIN LAST NIGHT AND I WATCHED "REMEMBER ME." I CRIED AT THE END! THEN I HAD A DREAM THAT I WAS DATING ROBERT PATTINSON. MY BRAIN DREAMS WIERD THINGS!!! TODAY I HAD ANOTHER DR. APPT AND MY EGGS ARE 13MM TODAY. I WAS HOPING TO STOP MY MEDICATION. NOPE, I HAVE TO GO BACK ON TUESDAY FOR ANOTHER CHECK. THEY ARE THINKING EITHER THURSDAY OR FRIDAY TO TAKE MY EGGS OUT. WELL I HOPE THEY KEEP ON GROWING. MY ESTRODIAL LEVEL IS 1400. SO THAT IS WHY I AM GETTING MY HEADACHES!!!! USUALLY YOUR LEVELS ARE AT 10 NORMALLY. SO IT WILL JUST GET WORSE. LOL. I AM GIVING JAXTEN A BATH RIGHT NOW SO I BETTER HURRY AND WASH HIM.

DAY 20-21

SO LAST NIGHT WAS A TRAUMATIC NIGHT FOR ME. YOU HAVE TO MIX HCG, LUPRON, AND FEMARA PERFECTLY. I HATE MIXING MY MEDS BECAUSE IT STRESSES ME OUT SOOOO BAD. SO QUINT USUALLY DOES IT. LAST NIGHT HE WAS AT SCHOOL SO I WAS BEING REALLY CAREFUL TO GET ALL THE MEASUREMENTS RIGHT. I WASH ON MY 4TH BOTTLE OF FEMERA AND TRYING TO GET ALL OF THE MEDICINE OUT OF THE BOTTLE AND IT LEAKS OUT OF THE NEEDLE AND I KNOW I LOST SOME MEDICINE. ONE SHOT IS $200.00 SO I DID NOT GET ALL OF MY DOSE. I AM FREAKING OUT THINKING I RUINED MY WHOLE CYCLE. SO I DO THE SHOT AND MY STOMACH SWELLS LIKE NO OTHER. IT IS SOOOO PAINFUL. YES, USUALLY THE STICKS HURT BUT THIS LASTED A 4 HOURS. I PUT ICE ON IT AND IT HURT SO BAD. QUINT TOLD ME I HIT A CAPILLARY IN MY STOMACH. FEELS MUCH BETTER TODAY.  YESTERDAY I WENT TO THE DR. FOR MY BLOOD TEST AND ULTRASOUND. MY RIGHT OVARY IS GETTING TO A SLOW START. IT ONLY HAS ABOUT FIVE EGGS AND MY LEFT HAS ABOUT 10. WE LOST THREE EGGS, SAD!!! HE SAID IT LOOKS GOOD AND TO KEEP ON MY MEDICINE. QUINT WILL BE DOING THAT TODAY.  I DO NOT LIKE MIXING THE MEDICATION. THE LAB CALLED ME YESTERDAY AND SAID MY LEVELS WERE AT 151 SO THAT IS  A GOOD NUMBER.

I WENT TO ECLIPSE WITH MY FRIENDS AND IT WAS SOOOO FUN!!!! I LOVED IT. WAS MY FAVORITE OF ALL THREE MOVIES. WE WENT TO THE 12:30 AM SHOWING. I GOT ABOUT 2 HOURS OF SLEEP AND DID GOOD YESTERDAY. I ATE LOTS OF SUGAR. THEN I CRASHED AND BURNED LAST NIGHT AND WENT TO BED AROUND 9PM. IT WAS TOTALLY WORTH IT. I HAD A DR. APPT EARLY AND WORK ALL DAY. LOL. I AM MUCH BETTER TODAY.

SO I HAVE A DR. APPT TODAY AND I WILL BE LATE TO WORK BUT AFTER THAT WE WILL SEE HOW THE DAY GOES. I AM GLAD TO FINALLY BE DONE WITH WORK THIS WEEK.  SO WE WILL SEE HOW TODAY GOES... QUINT IS TURNING 31 TOMORROW AND WE BOTH HAVE DR. APPTS. SO WE WILL SEE IF MY EGGS ARE GROWING TOMORROW. PLUS I AM GETTING MY HAIR COLORED YAAAAAAAAH!