My next two months

So this has been an interesting week for me.  i have truly learned who my true friends are that is for sure. It is funny how people treat you when you are going through something hard.

So We are starting out invitro process this next month.  I am very excited to start this journey that we are going to start next month.  People I talk to tell me that in vitro does not work the first time and you have to do it over and over.  I am trying to have faith that it will work for me.  It makes me very nervous about the whole thing but all I can do is take it one day at a time.  So next month I have to start taking birth control for a couple of weeks. Fuuny when are trying to get a baby.  Then I have to give myself shots every day of lupron until june 25th.  Lupron helps your ovaries get ready for this.  Then I have to take a bunch of other medications by shot to make me create 12-15 eggs and this medicine is called hgc.  So at this point i am doing two different shots a day.  I have to get my blood drawn every day to check my egg developement for a 10-14 day period. Once the eggs are ready I have to give myself a third shot to release the eggs.  Then the Dr. Will put me under anethstesia and go in and take the eggs out and grow the eggs and the sperm for about 5 days and then they will put the two best eggs back into my body and we will see if they end up growing in my uterus.  Which we hope they do. We are hoping that both eggs implant.  So that is a short version when my next two months will be like.So we are praying and hoping that all of the sacrifices we are making will end up with a baby.

JAXTEN THE NAUGHTY

SO JAXTEN HAS BEEN NAUGHTY....

SO YESTERDAY QUINT'S MOM WAS OUTSIDE AND APPARENTLY SHE LOST TRACK OF HIM AND HE HAD GONE DOWN THE STREET TO A NEIGHBORS HOUSE.
LATER THAT DAY, QUINT WAS WATCHING HIM AND FOR A SPLIT SECOND HE COULD NOT FIND HIM AT ALL. HE LOOKED IN THE GARAGE AND FOUND THAT HE HAD PUSHED THE GARAGE DOOR OPEN AND WAS DOWN THE STREET.
THAT SAME NIGHT, OUR ALARM WENT OFF IN MIDDLE OF NIGHT GUESS WHO TRIED TO ESCAPE? JAXTEN HAD TRIED TO LEAVE OUR HOUSE AGAIN!
TODAY WE TOOK HIM TO THE CHILDREN'S MUSUEM. IT IS THE CUTEST PLACE EVER. HE HAD A LOT OF FUN. THEY HAD BALLS THE KIDS COULD PLAY WITH AND HE LOVED THAT. THEY HAD BALLS, WATER, PUZZLES, GROCERY SHOPPING, KITCHEN AREA, AND MUCH MORE... THEY ALSO HAD A HELIPCOPTER THEY COULD CLIMB IT BUT JAXTEN WAS AFRAID OF IT. WHICH TO MY SURPRISE, HE LOVE HELICOPTERS. WE TOOK OUR EYE OFF HIM FOR A SPLIT SECOND AND HE TOOK OFF. WE WERE FREAKED OUT, I AM NOT EVEN KIDDING IT WAS MAYBE ONE OR TWO SECONDS. HE TOOK OFF DOWN THE STAIRS. THEN WE ALL TOOK A NAP THIS AFTERNOON.
QUINT IS WORKING AGAIN~ THIS INVITRO STUFF IS REALLY STRESSFUL ON US. I HOPE IT WILL BE ALL WORTH IT IN THE END.

so here is a little update date on my naughty two year old... I love him to death but he is one hard kid at times to deal with. I pick h im up from sitters house and I fight him with getting his pants on.  He keeps having tantrums all night long. He gets mad he tries throwing things and yelling at me.  It just gets so exhausting when I have to keep fighting his fits. He is a little bear today, he has been acting out since Quint is working so much. What do you do? I guess try to be as patient as you can.  Gotta love two year olds.

So as spring is here it makes me really happy for it to get warm.  So this blog may seem to others that I often am negative on here lately, I do apologize for that.  I am having a very hard time in my life and i am just trying to take one day at a time.  Today I had to go to work and it was a pretty long day for me.  What perterbed me today was when people do not do their share of work . So Quint is working tonight again and it really sucks at times but I know that it will only be for a short while. This invitro is really financially stressful for both of us.

Funny story.... I was at Target yesterday buying a few odds and ends.  I was checking out and the cashier asked if everything was ok at home.  I was like uh, ya. Then I noticed that my arm was really bruised from getting blood drawn from me.  Kind of made me laugh.

So as today the day of Easter I have had many emotions lately.  I am hurt, angry, upset. I do not understand why I can't have kids!!!! This makes me so angry, and when I listed to the prophets talk about being a good mom it just makes me feel really bad about my situation.  The only other person who knows how i would feel would be someone who has to go through this!!! I am not trying to put self pity on myself but this is so painful for me.  i felt my goal in life was to have kids and I cannot have them without paying a price of $20,000. Which if i get a child will be totally worth it.  It is just hard because we are working our butt's off to pay this bill off. This is the hardest thing i have ever gone through.

btw, we got an offer on our house.  We now need to see if the bank will accept that offer or not. We are hoping that they will accept the offer. Well sorry about the negative post but this is a hard day for me and my family.

So Jaxten has really made us laugh lately.  So my little one is a very stubborn high strung child.  He wanted to wear his ball pj's and I had him in his bear pj's he fought and fought me.  So when he fell asleep and went to check on him he was butt naked.

last night we were downstairs with Jaxten and he decided to be naked like he always does. He gets his sippy cup and pees in the cup and then he dumps his pee on the ground.

Funny stuff....